Self-Harm and Suicide: Staying Safe as a Teen

If you are thinking about suicide right now, please pause and reach out. Call or text 988, or chat at 988lifeline.org. It is free, confidential and open 24 hours a day.⁵ If you are in immediate danger, call 911. You do not have to have the right words. You can simply say, "I'm not okay."

Thoughts of suicide are more common than many people think, especially in the teen years. Having those thoughts does not mean something is wrong with who you are. It usually means you are in a lot of pain and need support. Pain can change, and help works. This page is for teens who are struggling, for friends who are worried, and for parents who want to know what to do.

Signs that someone may be thinking about suicide

Warning signs are clues that someone may need help now. They matter most when they are new, getting worse or tied to a painful event, loss or change.^4,6 Signs include:⁴

• What they say: talking about wanting to die, feeling like a burden, or feeling deep guilt or shame
• How they feel: hopeless, trapped, in unbearable pain, or like there is no reason to live; very sad, anxious, agitated or full of rage
• How they act: pulling away from friends, saying goodbye, giving away things that matter to them, taking dangerous risks, big mood swings, sleeping or eating much more or less, or using more alcohol or drugs

Some teens post hints online, such as sad song lyrics, goodbye messages or "nobody would miss me." Take these seriously.

Self-harm

Self-harm means hurting yourself on purpose. Many young people who self-harm say it is a way to cope with feelings that seem too big, like anger, numbness or deep sadness. It may bring short relief, but the pain comes back, and it can lead to serious injury.

Self-harm is a sign of distress that deserves care, not punishment or shame. If you self-harm, you are not "attention seeking" and you are not alone. Telling a trusted adult or doctor is a brave first step. Self-harm can be treated, and you can learn other ways to get through hard moments.

How common is it?

CDC's 2025 survey of US high school students found that the share who seriously considered suicide fell from 20% in 2023 to 14% in 2025. The share who made a plan fell from 16% to 12%, and the share who attempted suicide fell from 9% to 6%.¹ Girls reported all of these more often than boys, and younger high schoolers were more likely to have made a plan or attempt.¹

Around the world, suicide is the third leading cause of death among people aged 15 to 29.¹¹ Behind each number is a person, a family and a school community. Many young people who have suicidal thoughts get through them, especially with support.

Why it happens

There is never one single reason. Suicidal thoughts usually build from a mix of pain and stress, such as:

• Depression, anxiety, eating disorders or substance use (see anxiety and depression)
• Bullying, cyberbullying or feeling left out (see bullying)
• A breakup, a loss, family conflict or trouble at school
• Abuse, trauma or feeling unsafe at home
• Not getting enough sleep (see teen sleep)

Feeling connected matters a lot. In CDC's 2023 survey, students who felt close to people at school, and students whose parents usually knew where they were and who they were with, had lower rates of sadness and suicidal thoughts and attempts.¹⁰

How to help a friend: five steps

Research supports these five action steps.³

1. Ask. Ask directly: "Are you thinking about suicide?" It feels hard, but studies show asking does not increase suicidal thoughts.³
2. Be there. Listen without judging, arguing or rushing to fix things. Let them know you care. Talking openly may reduce suicidal thoughts.³
3. Help keep them safe. Stay with them if they are in danger. Get an adult involved. Adults can help make the space safer by putting away or removing things that could be used to cause harm.³
4. Help them connect. Help them call or text 988 together, and connect them with a trusted adult, school counselor, family member or mental health professional.³
5. Follow up. Check in the next day and the next week. Ongoing, caring contact plays an important role in suicide prevention.³

Making a safety plan

A safety plan is something you write ahead of time, when you are calmer, to use when things get hard. It works best when you make it with someone you trust, like a counselor, doctor or parent, and keep it where you can find it fast, such as on your phone.⁹ A typical plan includes:⁹

1. My warning signs. Thoughts, feelings or situations that tell me a crisis may be starting.
2. Things I can do on my own. Music, a walk, a shower, drawing, slow breathing or grounding.
3. People and places that help me feel better. A friend to text, a relative's house, a park or a library.
4. People I can ask for help. Names and numbers of trusted adults.
5. Professionals and crisis lines. My counselor or doctor, 988, and 911.
6. Making my space safer. Agreeing with an adult on steps to keep my surroundings safe during a crisis.
7. My reasons for living. People, pets, goals and things I look forward to.

Our free safety plan tool walks you through each step and lets you save or print it.

What helps

The badges show how strong the research is (see how we rate evidence).

UK guidelines also say medicine should not be used as a treatment on its own to reduce self-harm, and that simple "risk scores" should not be used to predict who will self-harm or to decide who gets care.⁹ Every person deserves a full, caring conversation.

For parents

• Ask directly if you are worried. "Are you thinking about suicide?" Calm, clear questions show you can handle the answer.³
• Listen first. Thank your teen for telling you. Avoid anger or panic in the moment.
• Make home safer. Lock up or remove medicines, firearms and other things that could be used for self-harm, especially during a hard time. Reducing access during a crisis can save lives.³
• Get help the same day if your teen talks about suicide. Call or text 988 for guidance, or contact your pediatrician or a mental health professional.
• Stay involved after a crisis. Follow-up care and steady contact matter.³
• Take care of yourself. Supporting a child in crisis is hard. Reach out for support too.

See also worried about suicide, mental health crisis and our guide for parents.

Common questions

Will asking about suicide make my friend think about it more?

No. Studies show asking directly does not increase suicidal thoughts or behavior. It shows you care and opens the door to help.³

What happens when I contact 988?

You reach a real person who listens, helps you through the moment and helps you think about next steps. It is free and confidential, and you can reach out for yourself or for someone you are worried about.⁵

My friend made me promise not to tell. What should I do?

Tell a trusted adult anyway. A friend's life matters more than a promise. You can say, "I care about you too much to keep this secret."

Do suicidal thoughts ever go away?

Yes. For most people, suicidal thoughts come and go, and they often ease as the pain underneath is treated. Many people who once felt this way go on to live full lives.

Test what you know with our suicide myths and facts quiz. More teen topics are on the teens hub.

When to get help

Education only. This page is general information written from the sources listed. It is not medical, legal or financial advice and does not replace a doctor, therapist or lawyer who knows your situation. How we write and check pages.